Continually for the last few months I've been listening to her and putting up with all of her little snide comments, hoping that she would change her mind or opinion or at least realize that she was being rude. I just wanted her to be happy for me, to actually be satisfied in the fact that I was in love and experiencing something new and exciting.

I still don't know why after all this time I still want her approval so badly, but I do. I want her to like and accept him and realize that if I think he's good enough for me, then he probably is.

So finally, after months of putting up with the insinuations that I should be moving on to someone else, I couldn't hold my tongue anymore. I took a big bite and launched into a big and painful discussion. At least she honestly told me what she wanted and what she feared. Not that I like what she had to say, or even necessarily agree with her, but she told me what I had been wondering for a while. And I know that she's only trying to protect me and hopes that I don't make the same mistakes that she did, but I can't help but think that it's all a little bit fucked.

And I can't get her out of my head. While I don't agree with most of her thoughts and fears, of course I have doubts from time to time and to have someone give a strong support to that doesn't really help build a secure foundation for the current relationship. It leaves me feeling as if I have to make a decision: do I reevaluate and listen to what she has said cut things off while I can save some of myself from being totally destroyed by love, or, should I mentally tell her to fuck off and live my life as it satisfies me?

I now find myself questioning whether I'm so upset and torn up about this because deep down I think she's right, or because I'm so upset that she can't support her own daughter in the decisions that she's making.

I don't want to loose what I have because my mother had the balls to mess with something she has no right involving herself in, but I can't help but wonder if she's only saving me from more hurt and pain further down the road...